


Matter To You (Like You Matter To Me)

by Blake_Belladonna_Defence_Force



Series: Bumbleby Oneshots [45]
Category: RWBY
Genre: F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Light Yangst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-27
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-13 04:28:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29022726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blake_Belladonna_Defence_Force/pseuds/Blake_Belladonna_Defence_Force
Summary: Prompt request Blake helping yang sort thru her feelings for her after they reunite & yang is questioning herself about will she think less of me.
Relationships: Blake Belladonna/Yang Xiao Long
Series: Bumbleby Oneshots [45]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1926181
Comments: 10
Kudos: 237





	Matter To You (Like You Matter To Me)

Their reunion isn’t anything like Blake had expected. She doesn’t quite know  _ what  _ she had been hoping for. A hug? Maybe a warm smile? A soft “I’m glad you’re okay.” as they both breathed a sigh of relief? Something other than the awkward glance Yang gives her before wandering off almost absentmindedly to one of the Schnee guest rooms.

For the first time, Blake comes to the horrifying thought that Yang might be  _ upset  _ with her for choosing to go with Ruby to Atlas and that idea doesn’t sit well with her at all. So, with a nervous heart and a determined step, Blake follows her, knocking on the door and slipping into the room and standing a little ways in front of where Yang sits on the edge of the bed, her fingers twisting in her lap as she refuses to meet Blake’s gaze.

“Yang? Is- is everything okay?” She asks, voice shaking a little more than she would like. Her right hand curls around her left bicep, an old, insecure habit from another time.

“Yeah. Did you want something?” Yang says, her voice coming out a little short, much shorter than Blake had grown used to hearing from her partner.

Blake tries, and fails, not to flinch. She knows Yang sees it, when her partner’s shoulders slump and she looks up at her with a wince, as though regretting her tone. “Okay… I thought we were past this but obviously not.” Blake mutters under her breath, swallowing thickly and stepping forward, diminishing the gap in between that makes her heart ache. “Yang, if you’re upset with me, I’d really appreciate it if you were honest about it because, and I don’t know if you’ve noticed this, we kind of can’t afford to be divided right now.”

“Huh?” Yang blinks, looking taken aback as she gives Blake a confused look, tilting her head and squinting at her. “Why- what makes you think I’m upset with you?  _ Why  _ would I be upset?”

“Because I left for Atlas? Because I chose to get Amity Arena up?” Blake shrugs, her fingers tightening around her arm slightly as anxiety courses through her chest. Her ears press against her head, her breath coming out in a shaky sigh. “Because I left you, even after I promised I wouldn’t?”

“Wha- _ fuck.  _ No.  _ No! _ ” Yang stumbles over her words, her lilac eyes going wide with panic as she reaches out for Blake, taking her hands and gently tugging her to stand in front of her. She gazes up at Blake, her expression earnest and full of worry as their eyes meet. “No, I- I know it’s not personal. You- you had to do what you thought was best, Blake. That’s not- I’m not upset. I mean… it’s not like we were ever going to stay separated, right?” Yang says, her voice pitching anxiously as she gently rubs Blake’s hands, a strange, pained expression crossing her eyes that takes Blake by surprise. “I- I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you think that I was upset with you. I’m just… I’m trying to sort something out in my head.”

“About…?” Blake encourages gently, a heavy weight lifting off of her chest as she watches Yang’s cheek tint pink. Maybe now wasn’t the time for conversations such as these… but when there’s too real of a chance of there never being another moment for them, Blake thinks that maybe it’s okay to be a little selfish. 

“About you.” Yang mumbles, her throat bobbing in a hard swallow as she looks away from Blake, a slow and shaky breath being drawn from her chest as her left hand trembles lightly against Blake’s own two. “I- I couldn’t stop thinking about you… about you and whether or not you’d think less of me for choosing Mantle over the big picture.”

Blake’s heart cracks a little when Yang’s voice wavers, her gaze still averted as her fingers cling to Blake’s hands as though afraid that she’ll fade away if she lets go. “Yang…” Blake says softly, biting her lip thoughtfully for a long moment before sighing and kneeling in front of her partner to look up at her, offering her a small, sad smile as she does. “I would never think less of you for making your own choices.”

“But-“

“Do you remember back on Brunswick farms? How I told you about Adam making me feel small?” Blake asks quietly, waiting for Yang to nod before continuing. “One thing that he did to me… was make his care, his  _ respect,  _ conditional. If my choices aligned with his, then he’d treat me with care. He’d respect me. But if they didn’t align… well… let’s just say there’s a reason why the idea of unconditional love and respect was so… unbelievable to me.” Blake says with a bitter, mirthless smile, shaking her head with a soft scoff. She swallows, hard, and squeezes Yang’s hands when her partner’s eyes shift to red, her jaw stiffening, and Blake knows it’s  _ for  _ her, not  _ at  _ her. “It hurt… knowing that respect hinged on every choice that I made, even if I thought it was the right one. It hurt knowing that- that he’d take it all away from me if he didn’t like what I did. I- Yang, I would  _ never  _ put you through that. You know that, right? I respect you so,  _ so  _ much and that’s unconditional. I would never fault you for making choices that don’t align with mine. I would never take that freedom from you.”

“I- I guess I just thought, since you’re so big picture focused, that you wouldn’t want a partner that’s so focused on smaller things.”

“But that’s what makes our partnership so amazing, Yang.” Blake murmurs, reaching up and cupping Yang’s jaw, watching as her partner’s eyes widen and her breathing hitches in her throat. “We balance each other out like that. I don’t need a Yes-Man. I need a partner that levels me out and grounds me when I get too wrapped up in the bigger picture. I love that you see things so differently. It reminds me to look at things a different way and that’s so important. It makes you..  _ you.  _ How could I possibly think less of you for that?”

“... you scare me. You know that?”

Blake blinks, pulling away from Yang, feeling a little hurt. That certainly isn’t what she’d been expecting. “I  _ scare  _ you?” She echoes, trying and failing to stop hurt from bleeding into her voice, her heart twisting at the idea that Yang was scared of her.

“Not- that’s not- I mean—“ Yang blows out a frustrated breath, closing her eyes and inhaling deeply. “You  _ know  _ I’ve never cared about what others think. I’ve never cared about scathing eyes and all that bullshit. I know who I am and I’m proud of that, y’know?” Yang says through a nervous laugh, her voice sounding strained as she tilts her head back and clears her throat roughly. “But then… but then there’s  _ you  _ and you’re  _ different  _ and that  _ terrifies  _ me.”

“... what do you mean I’m different?” Blake says slowly, her brow furrowing in confusion as Yang pulls her hands back and begins to card them through her hair. Her cheeks are flushing, her breathing coming a little faster and she looks mildly distressed. “Yang?”

“Back at Beacon… remember how I kept trying to bond with you? Yeah? Well, I have  _ never  _ tried that hard to impress somebody before. I- I’m more put together. I can charm and wink and flirt but then  _ you  _ come along and you’re just- you’re  _ different! _ I can’t just flirt and wink and charm my way through it.” Yang laughs again, her voice sounding more and more strained with every passing second and it  _ tugs violently  _ at Blake’s heart. “I can’t just be all blasé with you because you  _ matter  _ in a way that nobody else ever has. You make me feel things that I’ve never felt before and I just— it terrifies me how much I want to matter to you too.”

Blake freezes, her heart racing as her mind processes Yang’s rambling words… and then, she gets it.

Oh.

_ Oh. _

_ She gets it. _

“You want to matter to me… in what way?” Blake asks, desperately trying to shove down the urge to reassure Yang that she matters, shoving down the need to kiss her stupid, beautiful face silly right then and there. Instead, she reaches for Yang’s hands and holds them tenderly, waiting for her patiently, guiding her towards the answer that she can already see written so clearly in Yang’s eyes that it’s a wonder that she hadn’t seen it before now. “How do you want to matter to me, Yang?”

“I… want you to feel what I feel too.” Yang starts hesitantly, her eyes searching Blake’s face for  _ something.  _ When she spots what she’s looking for, her throat bobs in a hard swallow and her voice cracks. “I want to be somebody you can count on. Somebody that you trust… I want to be somebody that you- that you-“

“That I love?” Blake suggests, smiling tearfully when Yang falters. She reaches up to cup Yang’s jaw once more, watching as her partner shudders beneath her touch. 

“ _ Yes.”  _ Yang whispers, letting her forehead fall against Blake’s weakly. She gazes at her, still searching her face, before she speaks again, her voice as shaky as Blake feels. “You… you feel it too… right? It isn’t just me?”

“Of course I do.” Blake murmurs thickly, gently brushing their noses together and shivering when Yang’s breath ghosts over her lips. She hesitates, watching as Yang’s expression lights up with relief and, uncharacteristically, shyness. “You have no idea how much you matter to me… how much it hurt to leave you. I- I  _ do  _ love you and—“ Oh, Blake wants to put it into words how Yang makes her feel. She wants to sing her praises, to utter words of reverence into Yang’s ear. She wants her to  _ understand  _ how much Blake loves her. But none of that is what comes out. “— and I really want to kiss you right now.”

“I love you too.” Yang breathes, her voice catching in her throat and tears collecting in the corners of her ears as Blake lets out a watery little laugh. “And I really want you to kiss me too.” She adds, her voice taking on a slightly teasing note that makes Blake grin foolishly, despite the utter insanity of their environment.

Blake moves, cupping Yang’s jaw tenderly in her hands and pressing her lips against her own. A soft sigh escapes her, or maybe it’s Yang. She can’t really tell, too focused on how  _ perfectly  _ Yang’s hands fit against her waist, how  _ right  _ it feels to move forward until she’s sitting in her partner’s lap and drawing small whimpers from or the other of them as their kiss deepens and they mumble helpless “I love you” into each other’s mouths over and over again. Kissing Yang feels a lot like coming home, she realises. 

If this love is what home is for them… then Blake never wants either of them to feel homesick ever again.


End file.
